San Antonio Sport News

[Coach] Rumored Candidates

San Antonio Sport News - Thu, 05/24/2018 - 11:14

Jim Boylan

[Shot Doctor] Key NBA sources tell me the Magic coaching search to be concluded this Tuesday morning by 9 AM. An "under-the radar" name to watch this weekend is longtime NBA assistant coach Jim Boylan, who has ties to both Jeff Weltman and John Hammond. Boylan is interested, per sources

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Tom Izzo

[Mike Scotto] The Orlando Magic have expressed interest in Michigan State coach Tom Izzo for the team's head coaching position, league sources told The Athletic.

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Steve Clifford

[Marc Stein] The Magic are interviewing former Hornets coach Steve Clifford this week

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Kelvin Sampson

[Mitch Lawrence] In search for its new coach, Orlando now looking at U. of Houston's Kelvin Sampson, who is regarded as a top candidate for the vacancy. Jerry Stackhouse and other Toronto assistants not in play, per sources.

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Jerry Stackhouse

[Shams Charania] Charlotte and Orlando plan to interview Jerry Stackhouse, coach of Raptors’ G League team, for their head coach openings.

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Dwayne Casey

[Hoops Hype Canada] Orlando are in advanced discussions to reach agreement on a deal to hire former Raptors head coach Dwane Casey as 13th head coach in franchise history.

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Ime Udoka

[Woj] San Antonio assistant Ime Udoka will interview for the Orlando Magic coaching job this week, league sources tell ESPN. Udoka has also met with Charlotte.

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David Fizdale

[Woj] Magic met with Fizdale on Wednesday and he said both sides were impressed with each other but the Magic didn't make an offer.

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David Vanderpool

[Chris Haynes] Orlando has been granted permission to interview Portland assistant David Vanterpool for its vacant head coach position, league sources tell ESPN.

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Nick Nurse

[Josh Robbins] Possible Magic coaching candidates include Jerry Stackhouse, Nick Nurse, David Vanterpool

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How to continue wrestling career

San Antonio Sport News - Thu, 05/24/2018 - 08:22

When I joined my high school wrestling team last year it was the best decision I made in high school. While I sucked at first because I was new I went from having a 9-21 record junior year to having a 21-10 record this year so I am improving and I don’t wanna stop now, the only thing blocking me is that the college I’m going to (university of Houston) doesn’t have a wrestling team or club sport, so I have three options the hardest is to start a wrestling club at the school myself however I have no idea how to find a team or any coaches because I’m not to good myself and still needs lots of improvement, or could go to a local wrestling team/club the only problem being cost to join and transportation to get there as most of the good ones I looked up are like 30 minuets away from the campus, finally I could go to another college that dose have a club sport team however I really wanna go to uh ( the only other options being Texas state and ut San Antonio) I would love some opinions on what to do.

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The entire Bee Movie script except it's a cliffhanger

San Antonio Sport News - Wed, 05/23/2018 - 07:11

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow!

Let's shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Coming!

Hang on a second.

Hello?

Barry?

Adam?

Can you believe this is happening?

I can't.

I'll pick you up.

Looking sharp.

Use the stairs, Your father paid good money for those.

Sorry. I'm excited.

Here's the graduate.

We're very proud of you, son.

A perfect report card, all B's.

Very proud.

Ma! I got a thing going here.

You got lint on your fuzz.

Ow! That's me!

Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.

Bye!

Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!

Hey, Adam.

Hey, Barry.

Is that fuzz gel?

A little. Special day, graduation.

Never thought I'd make it.

Three days grade school, three days high school.

Those were awkward.

Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around The Hive.

You did come back different.

Hi, Barry. Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

Hear about Frankie?

Yeah.

You going to the funeral?

No, I'm not going.

Everybody knows, sting someone, you die.

Don't waste it on a squirrel.

Such a hothead.

I guess he could have just gotten out of the way.

I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day.

That's why we don't need vacations.

Boy, quite a bit of pomp under the circumstances.

Well, Adam, today we are men.

We are!

Bee-men.

Amen!

Hallelujah!

Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

Welcome, New Hive City graduating class of 9:15.

That concludes our ceremonies And begins your career at Honex Industries!

Will we pick our job today?

I heard it's just orientation.

Heads up! Here we go.

Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times.

Wonder what it'll be like?

A little scary.

Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group.

This is it!

Wow.

Wow.

We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life.

Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to The Hive.

Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey!

That girl was hot.

She's my cousin!

She is?

Yes, we're all cousins.

Right. You're right.

At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence.

These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology.

What do you think he makes?

Not enough.

Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman.

What does that do?

Catches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it.

Saves us millions.

Can anyone work on the Krelman?

Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones.

But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot.

But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life.

The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that.

What's the difference?

You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years.

So you'll just work us to death?

We'll sure try.

Wow! That blew my mind!

"What's the difference?"

How can you say that?

One job forever?

That's an insane choice to have to make.

I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life.

But, Adam, how could they never have told us that?

Why would you question anything? We're bees.

We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth.

You ever think maybe things work a little too well here?

Like what? Give me one example.

I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about.

Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach.

Wait a second. Check it out.

Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!

Wow.

I've never seen them this close.

They know what it's like outside The Hive.

Yeah, but some don't come back.

Hey, Jocks!

Hi, Jocks!

You guys did great!

You're monsters!

You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

I wonder where they were.

I don't know.

Their day's not planned.

Outside The Hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what.

You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that.

Right.

Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime.

It's just a status symbol.

Bees make too much of it.

Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it.

Those ladies?

Aren't they our cousins too?

Distant. Distant.

Look at these two.

Couple of Hive Harrys.

Let's have fun with them.

It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock.

Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom!

He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me!

Oh, my!

I never thought I'd knock him out.

What were you doing during this?

Trying to alert the authorities.

I can autograph that.

A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades?

Yeah. Gusty.

We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow.

Six miles, huh?

Barry!

A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it.

Maybe I am.

You are not!

We're going 0900 at J-Gate.

What do you think, buzzy-boy?

Are you bee enough?

I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means.

Hey, Honex!

Dad, you surprised me.

You decide what you're interested in?

Well, there's a lot of choices.

But you only get one.

Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day?

Son, let me tell you about stirring.

You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around.

You get yourself into a rhythm.

It's a beautiful thing.

You know, Dad, the more I think about it,

maybe the honey field just isn't right for me.

You were thinking of what, making balloon animals?

That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger.

Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey!

Barry, you are so funny sometimes.

I'm not trying to be funny.

You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer!

You're gonna be a stirrer?

No one's listening to me!

Wait till you see the sticks I have.

I could say anything right now.

I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!

Let's open some honey and celebrate!

Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!

I'm so proud.

We're starting work today!

Today's the day.

Come on! All the good jobs will be gone.

Yeah, right.

Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal...

Is it still available?

Hang on. Two left!

One of them's yours! Congratulations!

Step to the side.

What'd you get?

Picking crud out. Stellar!

Wow!

Couple of newbies?

Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

Make your choice.

You want to go first?

No, you go.

Oh, my. What's available?

Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think.

Any chance of getting the Krelman?

Sure, you're on.

I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

Wax monkey's always open.

The Krelman opened up again.

What happened?

A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one.

Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!

Oh, this is so hard!

Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler.

Barry, what do you think I should... Barry?

Barry!

All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine...

What happened to you?

Where are you?

I'm going out.

Out? Out where?

Out there.

Oh, no!

I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life.

You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?

Another call coming in.

If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today.

Hey, guys.

Look at that.

Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?

Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.

It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.

Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

Sign here, here. Just initial that.

Thank you.

OK.

You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain.

So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats.

Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us.

Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada!

That's awful.

And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans!

All right, launch positions!

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

Black and yellow!

Hello!

You ready for this, hot shot?

Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

Wind, check.

Antennae, check.

Nectar pack, check.

Wings, check.

Stinger, check.

Scared out of my shorts, check.

OK, ladies,

let's move it out!

Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers!

All of you, drain those flowers!

Wow! I'm out!

I can't believe I'm out!

So blue.

I feel so fast and free!

Box kite!

Wow!

Flowers!

This is Blue Leader, We have roses visual.

Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

Roses!

30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

Stand to the side, kid.

It's got a bit of a kick.

That is one nectar collector!

Ever see pollination up close?

No, sir.

I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one.

See that? It's a little bit of magic.

That's amazing. Why do we do that?

That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.

Cool.

I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow, Could be daisies, Don't we need those?

Copy that visual.

Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move.

Say again? You're reporting a moving flower?

Affirmative.

That was on the line!

This is the coolest. What is it?

I don't know, but I'm loving this color.

It smells good.

Not like a flower, but I like it.

Yeah, fuzzy.

Chemical-y.

Careful, guys. It's a little grabby.

My sweet lord of bees!

Candy-brain, get off there!

Problem!

Guys!

This could be bad.

Affirmative.

Very close.

Gonna hurt.

Mama's little boy.

You are way out of position, rookie!

Coming in at you like a missile!

Help me!

I don't think these are flowers.

Should we tell him?

I think he knows.

What is this?!

Match point!

You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it!

Yowser!

Gross.

There's a bee in the car!

Do something!

I'm driving!

Hi, bee.

He's back here!

He's going to sting me!

Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze!

He blinked!

Spray him, Granny!

What are you doing?!

Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable.

I gotta get home.

Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain. Can't fly in rain.

Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

Ken, could you close the window please?

Ken, could you close the window please?

Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out.

Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.

What was that?

Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes!

That is diabolical.

It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

What's number one? Star Wars?

Nah, I don't go for that... kind of stuff.

No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds.

When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.

There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.

I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it.

I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me.

Wait! Stop! Bee!

Stand back. These are winter boots.

Wait!

Don't kill him!

You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me!

Why does his life have less value than yours?

Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement?

I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling.

My brochure!

There you go, little guy.

I'm not scared of him.It's an allergic thing.

Put that on your resume brochure.

My whole face could puff up.

Make it one of your special skills.

Knocking someone out is also a special skill.

Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?

Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

You could put carob chips on there.

Bye.

Supposed to be less calories.

Bye.

I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something.

All right, here it goes.

Nah.

What would I say?

I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human.

I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to.

Oh, I can't do it. Come on!

No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't.

How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good.

Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

Hi!

I'm sorry. You're talking.

Yes, I know.

You're talking!

I'm so sorry.

No, it's OK. It's fine.

I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed.

Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting.

This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee!

I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me.

And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised.

That was a little weird. I'm talking with a bee.

Yeah.

I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me!

I just want to say I'm grateful.

I'll leave now.

Wait! How did you learn to do that?

What?

The talking thing.

Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.

That's very funny.

Yeah.

Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with.

Anyway... Can I... get you something?

Like what?

I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee?

I don't want to put you out.

It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.

It's just coffee.

I hate to impose.

Don't be ridiculous!

Actually, I would love a cup.

Hey, you want rum cake?

I shouldn't.

Have some.

No, I can't.

Come on!

I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.

Where?

These stripes don't help.

You look great!

I don't know if you know anything about fashion.

Are you all right?

No.

He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison.

He finally gets there.

He runs up the steps into the church.

The wedding is on.

And he says, "Watermelon?

I thought you said Guatemalan.

Why would I marry a watermelon?"

Is that a bee joke?

That's the kind of stuff we do.

Yeah, different.

So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

About work? I don't know.

I want to do my part for The Hive, but I can't do it the way they want.

I know how you feel.

You do?

Sure.

My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

Really?

My only interest is flowers.

Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan.

Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it?

You're in Sheep Meadow!

Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!

No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once.

Why do girls put rings on their toes?

Why not?

It's like putting a hat on your knee.

Maybe I'll try that.

You all right, ma'am?

Oh, yeah. Fine.

Just having two cups of coffee!

Anyway, this has been great.

Thanks for the coffee.

Yeah, it's no trouble.

Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life.

Are you...?

Can I take a piece of this with me?

Sure! Here, have a crumb.

Thanks!

Yeah.

All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not.

OK, Barry.

And thank you so much again... for before.

Oh, that? That was nothing.

Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...

This can't possibly work.

He's all set to go.

We may as well try it.

OK, Dave, pull the chute.

Sounds amazing.

It was amazing!

It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life.

Humans! I can't believe you were with humans!

Giant, scary humans!

What were they like?

Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

They eat crazy giant things.

They drive crazy.

Do they try and kill you, like on TV?

Some of them. But some of them don't.

How'd you get back?

Poodle.

You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see.

You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal.

Well...

Well?

Well, I met someone.

You did? Was she Bee-ish?

A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!

No, no, no, not a wasp.

Spider?

I'm not attracted to spiders.

I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face.

So who is she?

She's... human.

No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law.

Her name's Vanessa.

Oh, boy.

She's so nice. And she's a florist!

Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!

We're not dating.

You're flying outside The Hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

She saved my life! And she understands me.

This is over!

Eat this.

This is not over! What was that?

They call it a crumb.

It was so stingin' stripey!

And that's not what they eat.

That's what falls off what they eat!

You know what a Cinnabon is?

No.

It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up...

Sit down!

...really hot!

Listen to me!

We are not them! We're us.

There's us and there's them!

Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning?

There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me!

You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee!

Thinking bee.

Thinking bee.

Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

There he is. He's in the pool.

You know what your problem is, Barry?

I gotta start thinking bee?

How much longer will this go on?

It's been three days! Why aren't you working?

I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about.

What life? You have no life!

You have no job. You're barely a bee!

Would it kill you to make a little honey?

Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you.

Martin, would you talk to him?

Barry, I'm talking to you!

You coming?

Got everything?

All set!

Go ahead. I'll catch up.

Don't be too long.

Watch this!

Vanessa!

We're still here.

I told you not to yell at him.

He doesn't respond to yelling!

Then why yell at me?

Because you don't listen!

I'm not listening to this.

Sorry, I've gotta go.

Where are you going?

I'm meeting a friend.

A girl? Is this why you can't decide?

Bye.

I just hope she's Bee-ish.

They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena?

To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!

Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering.

A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events?

No. All right, I've got one.

How come you don't fly everywhere?

It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster.

Yeah, OK, I see, I see.

All right, your turn.

TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane!

You don't have that?

We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease.

Oh, my.

Dumb bees!

You must want to sting all those jerks.

We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us.

So you have to watch your temper.

Very carefully.

You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust.

Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

Yeah.

What is wrong with you?!

It's a bug.

He's not bothering anybody.

Get out of here, you creep!

What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?

Yeah, it was. How did you know?

It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

You've really got that down to a science.

I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.

I'll bet.

What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this?

How did this get here? cute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select?

Is he that actor?

I never heard of him.

Why is this here?

For people. We eat it.

You don't have enough food of your own?

Well, yes.

How do you get it?

Bees make it.

I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it!

There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing!

It's organic.

It's our-ganic!

It's just honey, Barry.

Just what?!

Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

You've taken our homes, schools,hospitals! This is all we have!

And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this.

I'm getting to the bottom of all of this!

Hey, Hector. You almost done?

Almost.

He is here. I sense it.

Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around.

You're busted, box boy!

I knew I heard something.

So you can talk!

I can talk. And now you'll start talking!

Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier?

I don't understand.

I thought we were friends.

The last thing we want to do is upset bees!

You're too late! It's ours now!

You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword!

You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio!

Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where!

Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!

Crazy person!

What horrible thing has happened here?

These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now

they're on the road to nowhere!

Just keep still.

What? You're not dead?

Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed?

To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here.

I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

I'm going to Tacoma.

And you?

He really is dead.

All right.

Uh-oh!

What is that?!

Oh, no!

A wiper! Triple blade!

Triple blade?

Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!

Why does everything have

to be so doggone clean?!

How much do you people need to see?!

Open your eyes!

Stick your head out the window!

From NPR News in Washington,

I'm Carl Kasell.

But don't kill no more bugs!

Bee!

Moose blood guy!!

You hear something?

Like what?

Like tiny screaming.

Turn off the radio.

Whassup, bee boy?

Hey, Blood.

Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see.

Wow!

I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours.

Bees hang tight. We're all jammed in.

It's a close community.

Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own.

What if you get in trouble?

You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack!

At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls.

Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.

You got to be kidding me!

Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee!

Hey, guys!

Mooseblood!

I knew I'd catch y'all down here.

Did you bring your crazy straw?

We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit.

What is this place?

A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead.

They are pinheads!

Pinhead.

Check out the new smoker.

Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000!

Smoker?

Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out.

They make the honey, and we make the money.

"They make the honey, and we make the money"?

Oh, my!

What's going on? Are you OK?

Yeah. It doesn't last too long.

Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls?

Our queen was moved here. We had no choice.

This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen!

What is this?

Oh, no!

There's hundreds of them!

Bee honey.

Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale!

This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something.

Oh, Barry, stop.

Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor.

Do these look like rumors?

That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this?

He's been talking to humans.

What? Talking to humans?!

He has a human girlfriend. And they make out!

Make out? Barry!

We do not.

You wish you could.

Whose side are you on?

The bees!

I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

Barry, this is what you want to do with your life?

I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees!

Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked

your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop.

I remember that.

What right do they have to our honey?

We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

Even if it's true, what can one bee do?

Sting them where it really hurts.

In the face! The eye!

That would hurt.

No.

Up the nose? That's a killer.

There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters.

Hive at Five, The Hive's only full-hour action news source.

No more bee beards!

With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Chung.

Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.

And I'm Jeanette Ohung.

A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally!

Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon.

Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.

Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from The Hive. I can't do this"?

Bees have never been afraid to change the world.

What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.

We were thinking of stickball or candy stores.

How old are you?

The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century.

You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too.

It's a common name. Next week...

He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots...

Next week...

Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em.

Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live.

Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish.

In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness!

It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.

Honey, her backhand's a joke!

I'm not gonna take advantage of that?

Quiet, please.

Actual work going on here.

Is that that same bee?

Yes, it is!

I'm helping him sue the human race.

Hello.

Hello, bee.

This is Ken.

Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

Why does he talk again?

Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working.

But it's our yogurt night!

Bye-bye.

Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours!

Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help.

Frosting...

How many sugars?

Just one. I try not to use the competition.

So why are you helping me?

Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now.

Those are great, if you're three.

And artificial flowers.

Oh, those just get me psychotic!

Yeah, me too.

Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

Bees must hate those fake things!

Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done.

Maybe this could make up for it a little bit.

This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.

I guess.

You sure you want to go through with it?

Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty!

It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak.

What have we gotten into here, Barry?

It's pretty big, isn't it?

I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day.

You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers?

Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade.

What's the matter?

I don't know, I just got a chill.

Well, if it isn't the bee team.

You boys work on this?

All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding.

All right. Case number 4475,

Superior Court of New York,

Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session.

Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively?

A privilege.

Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world?

I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed.

Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us.

If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean.

I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches!

Talking bee!

How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry?

They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids!

Mr. Benson?

Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives.

Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys!

I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are!

I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice!

Call your first witness.

So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have.

I suppose so.

I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron!

Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms.

Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term.

I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you?

No.

I couldn't hear you.

No.

No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey.

They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

You mean like this?

Bears kill bees!

How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away.

So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. Where have I heard it before?

I was with a band called The Police.

But you've never been a police officer, have you?

No, I haven't.

No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name.

Oh, please.

Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

That's not his real name?! You idiots!

Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005.

Thank you. Thank you.

I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow.

I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir?

Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now!

This isn't a goodfella.

This is a badfella!

Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?!

Order in this court!

You're all thinking it!

Order! Order, I say!

Say it!

Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side.

Are we doing everything right, legally?

I'm a florist.

Right. Well, here's to a great team.

To a great team!

Well, hello.

Ken!

Hello.

I didn't think you were coming.

No, I was just late I tried to call, but... the battery.

I didn't want all this to go to waste,

so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

Oh, that was lucky.

There's a little left. I could heat it up.

Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby.

That's where I usually sit. Right... there.

Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill.

You think I don't see what you're doing?

I know how hard it is to find the right job. We have that in common.

Do we?

Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

That's just what I was thinking about doing.

Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

I'm going to drain the old stinger.

Yeah, you do that.

Look at that.

You know, I've just about had it with your little Mind Games.

What's that?

Italian Vogue.

Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.

A lot of ads.

Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine?

Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here!

I love the smell of flowers.

How do you like the smell of flames?!

Not as much.

Water bug! Not taking sides!

Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat!

This is pathetic!

I've got issues!

Well, well, well, a royal flush!

You're bluffing.

Am I?

Surf's up, dude!

Poo water!

That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings!

Kenneth! What are you doing?!

You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it!

We need to talk! He's just a little bee!

And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time!

Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life?

No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them!

Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...

My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster!

Goodbye, Ken.

And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man!

I'm sorry about all that.

I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it!

I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it.

Oh, well.

Are you OK for the trial?

I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas.

We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers...

Yeah.

Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over.

Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees.

You got the tweezers?

Are you allergic?

Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know.

What exactly is your relationship to that woman?

We're friends.

Good friends?

Yes.

How good? Do you live together?

Wait a minute... Are you her little... bedbug?

I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children?

Yeah, but...

So those aren't your real parents!

Oh, Barry...

Yes, they are!

Hold me back!

You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson?

He's denouncing bees!

Don't y'all date your cousins?

Objection!

I'm going to pincushion this guy!

Adam, don't! It's what he wants!

Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit!

Order! Order!

The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way!

Adam, stay with me.

I can't feel my legs.

What Angel of Mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks?

I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please!

The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed Turn Against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

Hey, buddy.

Hey.

Is there much pain?

Yeah.

I... I blew the whole case, didn't I?

It doesn't matter. What matters is

you're alive. You could have died.

I'd be better off dead. Look at me.

They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it.

What was it like to sting someone?

I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then...and then ecstasy!

All right.

You think it was all a trap?

Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this.

What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world.

What will the humans do to us if they win?

I don't know.

I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad.

Adam, they check in, but they don't check out!

Oh, my.

Could you get a nurse to close that window?

Why?

The smoke.

Bees don't smoke.

Right. Bees don't smoke.

Bees don't smoke!

But some bees are smoking.

That's it! That's our case!

It is? It's not over?

submitted by /u/NoviceFarmer01 to r/copypasta
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ACS | May 23rd, 2018 | Jay Hayden + Hollywood Hand-Me Downs

San Antonio Sport News - Wed, 05/23/2018 - 04:01

Download/Listen: http://adamcarolla.com/jay-hayden-hollywood-hand-me-downs/

Show Summary

Adam opens the show talking about the audition process, and how trying out for commercials is a different skill. Adam then recalls a conversation he had with Laxamana about knowing people’s sexual orientation based on the TV characters they play. Adam also talks about race relations as it pertains to the homeless situation, and the city of Los Angeles falling apart. Later, Dawson asks Adam about borrowing tools for a flooring project for his new studio, and Adam takes fan phone calls about Drawn Together, and answering your cell phone on a plane. Before the break, Adam and Shek bring today’s Good Sports.

Jay Hayden is in studio next. Adam talks with him about having his own building and design firm. They also talk about his show Station 19, where Jay plays a gay firefighter. Adam asks if he gets heat for being a straight guy playing a gay character, and Jay talks about not preparing for the role. Up next, the guys play a new Movie Memorabilia guessing game called Hollywood Hand-Me-Downs. Gina then begins the news talking about Starbucks’ new guest policy. Other news stories involve the manhunt following a 10-minute prison escape, a program that teaches kids how to build, and an escaped monkey at the San Antonio Airport. As the show wraps up, the guys talk about testing a hangover pill, and the growing concern surrounding super gonorrhea.

Season 2 of Station 19 is coming to ABC this fall. You can watch Season 1 on Hulu, and follow Jay on Twitter @JayHayden00.

References

Jim Abbott Poop Throw

Images

http://adamcarolla.com/jay-hayden-hollywood-hand-me-downs/nggallery/slideshow

submitted by /u/LonrSpankster to r/Carolla
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ACS: 2018-05-23-Jay Hayden + Hollywood Hand-Me-Downs

San Antonio Sport News - Wed, 05/23/2018 - 01:23

PART 1

Adam opens the show talking about the audition process, and how trying out for commercials is a different skill. Adam then recalls a conversation he had with Laxamana about knowing people’s sexual orientation based on the TV characters they play. Adam also talks about race relations as it pertains to the homeless situation, and the city of Los Angeles falling apart. Later, Dawson asks Adam about borrowing tools for a flooring project for his new studio, and Adam takes fan phone calls about Drawn Together, and answering your cell phone on a plane. Before the break, Adam and Shek bring today’s Good Sports.

Jay Hayden is in studio next. Adam talks with him about having his own building and design firm. They also talk about his show Station 19, where Jay plays a gay firefighter. Adam asks if he gets heat for being a straight guy playing a gay character, and Jay talks about not preparing for the role. Up next, the guys play a new Movie Memorabilia guessing game called Hollywood Hand-Me-Downs. Gina then begins the news talking about Starbucks’ new guest policy. Other news stories involve the manhunt following a 10-minute prison escape, a program that teaches kids how to build, and an escaped monkey at the San Antonio Airport. As the show wraps up, the guys talk about testing a hangover pill, and the growing concern surrounding super gonorrhea.

Season 2 of Station 19 is coming to ABC this fall. You can watch Season 1 on Hulu, and follow Jay on Twitter @JayHayden00.

Producers: Chris Laxamana, Mike August, Mike Lynch, and Mike Dawson
Co-Producers: Gary Smith, Matt Fondiler, Caelan Biehn, and Dylan Wrenn
Newsgirl: Gina Grad
Sound Effects: Bryan Bishop

 

Post generated by ACSBot from http://adamcarolla.com/jay-hayden-hollywood-hand-me-downs/

submitted by /u/gomeztogo to r/AdamCarolla
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[USA-TX][H] iPhone X cases / Apple Watch bands [W] Paypal / Local Cash

San Antonio Sport News - Mon, 05/21/2018 - 21:29

iPhone X cases

Apple Bright orange leather case - Asking $40 shipped. Cost $50 from Apple, practically brand new. I just exchanged my old leather case for this color.
Apple Blue leather folio - Asking $70 shipped. Cost $100 new from Apple.

Apple Watch 38mm Bands - buy them all for $125

Midnight Blue Leather Loop - $80 shipped. Cost $150 from Apple, had to cut the lugs to fit my 38mm watch. Looks and functions fine, don't wear it as much since my watch came with a navy blue band.

Spicy Orange Sport Loop - $35 shipped. Cost $50 from Apple.

Black Sport Band - $35 shipped. Cost $50 from Apple

Timestamps here. If you are interested in multiple things we can definitely work out a discount. Also, if you're in San Antonio I can do a local deal at a discount as well. Please comment if you're going to pm me :)!

submitted by /u/a_vulpix to r/appleswap
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[USA-TX][H] Switch games, iPhone X cases, Apple Watch Bands [W] PayPal / Local Cash

San Antonio Sport News - Mon, 05/21/2018 - 20:42

Switch Games all for $110 shipped! SOLD
Pokken Tournament DX
Super Mario Odyssey
Mario Kart 8
Resident Evil Revelations

iPhone X cases

Apple Bright orange leather case - Asking $40 shipped. Cost $50 from Apple, practically brand new. I just exchanged my old leather case for this color.
Apple Blue leather folio - Asking $70 shipped. Cost $100 new from Apple.

Apple Watch Bands - buy them all for $125 (all bands are 38 mm)

Midnight Blue Leather Loop - $80 shipped. Cost $150 from Apple, had to cut the lugs to fit my 38mm watch. Looks and functions fine, don't wear it as much since my watch came with a navy blue band.

Spicy Orange Sport Loop - $35 shipped. Cost $50 from Apple.

Black Sport Band - $35 shipped. Cost $50 from Apple

Timestamps here. If you are interested in multiple things we can definitely work out a discount. Also, if you're in San Antonio I can do a local deal at a discount as well. Please comment if you're going to pm me :)!

submitted by /u/a_vulpix to r/hardwareswap
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Canadian NHL/NBA/MLB Championship Drought Extends to 25 Years

San Antonio Sport News - Mon, 05/21/2018 - 14:38

I've posted this before in other sports subs, most recently to update with Toronto FC's win last fall over the Sounders. This was the first championship for a Canadian NHL/NBA/MLB/MLS team since the Toronto Blue Jays. They did so in both 1992 and 1993 with a dominant team, just beating out the Montreal Canadiens' 1993 Stanley Cup win. The poor Expos by all rights had a great shot at the 1994 title that was cut short by strike.

Since the MLS is considerably more junior than the NHL/NBA/MLB, it merits an update since that drought is still running with the Winnipeg Jets loss to the Vegas Golden Knights yesterday.

But wait you say, there is a sixth major professional sporting league in North America, the CFL! Canadian football is a fascinating sport that is well worth a watch that currently only has Canadian teams, just as the NFL only has teams from the US. What many people don't realize is that during the '90s, the CFL had an ultimately unsuccessful expansion attempt into the US, but successfully formed teams in Baltimore, Las Vegas, Sacramento, Shreveport, San Antonio, Birmingham, and Memphis. Of these, the most successful was the Baltimore Stallions, who won the Grey Cup in 1995. This is a great writeup.

Sadly, soon after winning, the Ravens moved to Baltimore, and the Stallions relocated to Montréal to become the Alouettes. In the time since the Blue Jays won their last World Series, the following Canadian teams have been eligible for major titles:

Sport Team Years Chances Titles MLB Toronto Blue Jays 1995-2017 23 0 MLB Montreal Expos 1995-2004 10 0 NBA Toronto Raptors 1995-2018 23 0 NBA Vancouver Grizzlies 1995-2001 6 0 NHL Montreal Canadiens 1993-2004,2005-2018 24 0 NHL Toronto Maple Leafs 1993-2004,2005-2018 24 0 NHL Vancouver Canucks 1993-2004,2005-2018 24 0 NHL Calgary Flames 1993-2004,2005-2018 24 0 NHL Edmonton Oilers 1993-2004,2005-2018 24 0 NHL Ottawa Senators 1993-2004,2005-2018 24 0 NHL Winnipeg Jets 1993-1996,2011-2018 10 0 NHL Quebec Nordiques 1993-1994 2 0 Total 219 0 Sport Team Years Chances Titles CFL Baltimore Stallions 1994-1995 2 1

The Baltimore Stallions Grey Cup was more recent than the most recent Canadian Championship in the other 3 sports. The Blue Jays will have the next chance to end the drought, but are just under .500 at the moment.

submitted by /u/bakonydraco to r/sports
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The Standings Game - Ideal Results for the Week of May 21st, 2018

San Antonio Sport News - Sun, 05/20/2018 - 10:45

Welcome to The Standings Game!

The Standings Game is something I plan on putting together every week for this subreddit so we can keep track of our race to a playoff berth. It is essentially a list of the most ideal results for all USL games (with respect to Colorado Springs's position in the standings) on a given week. I will only assign ideal outcomes to games that affect the Western Conference standings.

I will also make a note of which games are most important to our current situation in the standings. These will mostly be intra-conference games, however they can also include games where a team is threatening to remove us from a playoff position, or games with a significant statistical impact on Colorado Springs's playoff chances.

At the end of each week's schedule, I will update the list with the actual results, as well as indicate how the game affected our statistical probability of making the playoffs. Games that have an insignificant or near-zero effect on our standings will be denoted with a +/-0.0% value. Games regarding teams that have already clinched a playoff berth or been statistically eliminated will not be listed, unless their opponent is of relevance to Colorado Springs's standings.

Please note that there might be some numbers that don't quite make sense, or percentages that may change in the middle of an evening of games. I'll do my best to update and explain these, but if anything seems off or confusing, feel free to ask!

Note: all ideal results are assumed to be regulation victories, unless otherwise noted.

Ideal Results for Wednesday, May 23rd, 2018

Matchup Ideal Result Importance Actual Result Playoff % Effect Los Angeles Galaxy II @ Rio Grande Valley FC Draw Average TBD TBD%

Ideal Results for Saturday, May 19th, 2018

Matchup Ideal Result Importance Actual Result Playoff % Effect Phoenix Rising FC @ Swope Park Rangers PHX Win Average TBD TBD% Real Monarchs SLC @ Portland Timbers 2 SLC Win Average TBD TBD% Saint Louis FC @ Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC COS Win Key Game TBD TBD% OKC Energy FC @ Tulsa Roughnecks FC Draw Average TBD TBD% Fresno FC @ Orange County SC Draw Average TBD TBD% Las Vegas Lights FC @ Los Angeles Galaxy II LAG Win Average TBD TBD% San Antonio FC @ Reno 1868 FC Draw Average TBD TBD%

Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC Playoff Chances
Before Games: 29.4%
After Games: TBD%
Change: TBD%

Last Weeks Standings Game
Current USL Standings
Sports Clubs Stats: Source used to extrapolate all data in this post.

submitted by /u/tugreenwave to r/SwitchbacksFC
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Premier League: what future for Antonio Conte, who should leave Chelsea?

San Antonio Sport News - Fri, 05/18/2018 - 22:56

https://i.redd.it/139h2zefuqy01.jpg

Premier League: what future for Antonio Conte, who should leave Chelsea. It’s almost a certainty, Antonio Conte should no longer be on the bench next season Chelsea, the fault of his bad relations with management and disappointing results in 2017-2018. If the future of the former coach of the Nazionale remains unclear, FF goes around the options he could have at his disposal.

An Italian club, Naples in pole

If a return to Juventus Turin is excluded, Italy is not an option to dismiss for the Italian technician. Maurizio Sarri, the coach of Naples, could leave his heart club at the end of the season and President Aurelio De Laurentiis would be interested in an arrival of Conte on the bench Neapolitan. Excited by his work and very Italian in his way of seeing football, Antonio Conte has the necessary characteristics to seduce a demanding Neapolitan public. His defense three would not be a problem in San Paolo, used to the play position Sarri, and Conte would have a very important right of scrutiny on the transfer window, sine qua non-condition on his arrival on a sideline.But if Naples can see in Antonio Conte the suitable substitute of Maurizio Sarri , some tifosi interistors would also see a good eye the arrival of the native of Lecce Giuseppe Meazza. Not sure whether to play the Champions League next season or retain Luciano Spalletti, Inter could position itself on the 48-year-old coach. Nevertheless, the lack of resources of the Asian shareholder and the obligation to sell some of the best elements of the eleven could cool Conte, while AC Milan , for its part, will extend the adventure with Gennaro Gattuso.

A sabbatical year

Paris has Tuchel, the Nazionale has Mancini and the other tracks are not hot for Antonio Conte. So that one might think that the ideal for the Italian coach might be to take a sabbatical year. It never happened to him in his coaching career, started in 2007, but Conte could be well inspired to make this choice, which had succeeded to Jurgen Klopp, now in the Champions League final after a year of vacation between Dortmund and Liverpool. For Conte, the sabbatical year could also be the way to pause and wait for the doors of the biggest European stables open to him, while few clubs will change coach and some have already been appointed. Thomas Tuchel had for example chosen not to return to the bench after his departure from Dortmund and is now in Paris. It remains to be seen if the sabbatical year corresponds to the boiling temperament of Antonio Conte …

Stay in London … for Arsenal?

This is perhaps the most unlikely option: sign at Arsenal. After two seasons in Chelsea, Antonio Conte knows that the place is free among the Gunners after 22 years of Arsene Wenger’s loyal service.. And the idea might not be so incongruous. In a wealthy club, Antonio Conte would have the opportunity to play the maestros at all levels and would especially have the opportunity to obtain full sports powers, provided that his superiors finally decide to spend as much as cash. In addition, Arsenal will not play the Champions League next season, as when he arrived in Chelsea, and the tactical transalpine would have the leisure to devote to the Premier League, a trophy that escapes the former club Thierry Henry since the invincible 2004. For Arsenal, who was cut off under the foot by the Paris Saint-Germain about Thomas Tuchel, bringing Conte could also represent one of the most beneficial options, in a completely different style, of course, to get off to a good start after the Wenger era…

An exotic freelance?

It is a track not to be discarded. Antonio Conte has never driven far from his European bases but, like Fabio Cannavaro, Fabio Capello or André Villas-Boas, taking a club in China may be an option. Obviously, a freelance in the middle empire would have an interest almost exclusively financial, but, unlike a sabbatical year, it would have the virtue of not completely cut the bridges with the coaching profession and the advantage a new culture to discover. Negative point, however, exile in Asia remains the best way to be forgotten, even if being known in the eyes of Chinese investors, ever more likely to get involved in Europe (Milan, Inter …), could well be an advantage when you return to Europe.

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U.S. Open Cup Thread: Round 2

San Antonio Sport News - Wed, 05/16/2018 - 15:57

#USOC2018

Flashscore live table

US Soccer Stream Central

Charleston Battery (USL) 1-0 South Georgia Tormenta FC (PDL)

7:00 ET – MUSC Health Stadium; Charleston, SC

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 21' GOAL Charleston Battery Patrick Okonkwo 1-0 - Half Time - - 1-0 63' Red Card Charleston Battery Nico Rittmeyer 1-0 87' Red Card Tormenta FC Nil Vinyals 1-0 - FULL TIME - - 1-0

Round 3: Charleston Battery hosts Elm City Express

[ERIE] Erie Commodores (NPSL) 1-2 Pittsburgh Riverhouds (USL)

7:00 ET – Gannon University Field; Erie, PA

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 4' GOAL Pittsburgh Riverhounds Thomas Vancaeyezeele [ERIE] 0-1 30' GOAL Pittsburgh Riverhounds Kevin Kerr [ERIE] 0-2 43' GOAL [ERIE] Erie Commodores Cam Philopot [ERIE] 1-2 - Half Time - - [ERIE] 1-2 - FULL TIME - - [ERIE] 1-2

Round 3: Pittsburgh Riverhounds hosts FC Cincinnati

Louisville City FC (USL) 5-0 Long Island Rough Riders (PDL)

7:00 ET – Lynn Stadium (University of Louisville); Louisville, KY

No stream tonight, sorry

Time Event Team Player Score 25' GOAL Louisville City FC Kyle Smith 1-0 37' GOAL Louisville City FC Ilija Ilic 2-0 - Half Time - - 2-0 68' GOAL Louisville City Luke Spencer 3-0 81' GOAL Louisville City Brian Ownby 4-0 89' GOAL Louisville City Cameron Lancaster 5-0 - FULL TIME - - 5-0

Round 3: Louisville City hosts Saint Louis FC

FC Motown (NPSL) 1-3 Penn FC (USL) [PENN]

7:00 ET – Ranger Stadium (Drew University); Madison, NJ

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score Half Time - - 0-0 [PENN] 53' GOAL FC Motown Dilly Duka 1-0 [PENN] 79' GOAL [PENN] Penn FC Miguel Jaime 1-1 [PENN] 80' GOAL [Penn] Penn FC Prince Baffoe 1-2 [PENN] 90' GOAL [Penn] Penn FC Pedro Galvao 1-3 [PENN] - FULL TIME - - 1-3 [PENN]

Round 3: Penn FC plays @ Richmond Kickers

North Carolina FC (USL) 3-0 Lansdowne Bhoys (LQ)

7:00 ET – Sahlen's Stadium at WakeMed Soccer Park; Cary, NC

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 2' GOAL North Carolina FC Connor Tobin 1-0 44 GOAL North Carolina FC Marios Lomis 2-0 - Half Time - - 2-0 74' GOAL North Carolina FC Bernard Luxbacher 3-0 - FULL TIME - - 3-0

Round 3: North Carolina FC hosts Ocean City Nor'Easters

Reading United AC (PDL) 1-2 Richmond Kickers (USL)

7:00 ET – Alvernia University Stadium; Reading, PA

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 8' GOAL Richmond Kickers Koby Osei-Wusu 0-1 - Half Time - - 0-1 70' GOAL Reading United AC Khori Bennett 1-1 Extra Time - - 1-1 119' Red Card Richmond Kickers Abdul Umar 1-1 - End Extra Time - - 1-1 - AFTER PENALTIES - - 1-2

Round 3: Richmond Kickers host Penn FC

Charlotte Independence (USL) 1-3 Ocean City Nor'Easters (PDL)

7:30 ET – Mecklenburg County Sportsplex; Matthews, NC

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 4' GOAL Ocean City Kyle Gurrieri 0-1 5' GOAL Ocean City Kyle Gurrieri 0-2 44' GOAL Ocean City Fredlin Mompremier 0-3 Half Time - - 0-3 58' GOAL Charlotte Independence Jorge Herrera 1-3 - FULL TIME - - 1-3

Round 3: Ocean City Nor'easters play @ North Carolina FC

FC Cincinnati (USL) 4-1 Detroit City FC (NPSL)

7:30 ET – Gettler Stadium (Univ. of Cincinnati); Cincinnati, OH

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 31' GOAL Detroit City Shawn Lawson 0-1 35' GOAL FC Cincinnati Emery Welshman 1-1 Half Time - - 1-1 Extra Time - - 1-1 94' GOAL FC Cincinnati Corben Bone 2-1 98' GOAL FC Cincinnati Emery Welshman 3-1 110' GOAL FC Cincinnati Emery Welshman 4-1 - AFTER EXTRA TIME - - 4-1

Round 3: FC Cincinnati plays @ Pittsburgh Riverhounds

Seacoast United Phantoms (PDL) 0-2 Elm City Express (NPSL) [ELM]

7:30 ET – Seacoast United Sports Park; Amesbury, MA

No stream tonight, sorry

Time Event Team Player Score Half Time - - 0-0 [ELM] 80' GOAL [ELM] Elm City Express Shaquille Saunchez 0-1 [ELM] 88' GOAL [ELM] Elm City Express Shaquille Saunchez 0-2 [ELM] 90' Red Card Seacoast United Phantoms Dan Bennett 0-2 [ELM] - FULL TIME - - 0-2 [ELM]

Round 3: Elm City Express play @ Charleston Battery

[DUL] Duluth FC (NPSL) 0-2 Saint Louis FC (USL)

7:00 CT – Public Schools Stadium; Duluth, MN

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 25' GOAL Saint Louis FC Kadeem Dacres [DUL] 0-1 35' GOAL Saint Louis FC Corey Hertzog [DUL] 0-2 - Half Time - - [DUL] 0-2 - FULL TIME - - [DUL] 0-2

Round 3: Saint Louis FC plays @ Louisville City

Mississippi Brilla (PDL) 1-0 Indy Eleven (USL)

7:00 CT – Clinton High School; Clinton, MS

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score - Half Time - - 0-0 84' GOAL Mississippi Brilla 1-0 - FULL TIME - - 1-0

Round 3: Mississippi Brilla plays @ Nashville SC

Sacramento Republic (USL) 3-1 San Francisco City FC (PDL)

5:00 PT – Hornet Soccer Field; Sacramento, CA

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 23' GOAL Sacramento Republic Keven Alemán 1-0 32' GOAL San Francisco City Aaron Lombardi 1-1 - Half Time - - 1-1 59' GOAL Sacramento Republic Villyan Bijev 2-1 68' GOAL Sacramento Republic Adam Moffat 3-1 - FULL TIME - - 1-1

Round 3: Sacramento plays @ Reno 1868 FC

Tulsa Roughnecks (USL) 3-4 FC Wichita (NPSL)

7:00 CT – Hurricane Soccer & Track Stadium; Tulsa, OK

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 29' GOAL Tulsa Roughnecks Jhon Pirez 1-0 35' GOAL FC Wichita Thomas Wells 1-1 38' GOAL Tulsa Roughnecks Jhon Pirez 2-1 - Half Time - - 2-1 48' GOAL FC Wichita Nelson Landaverde 2-2 50' Red Card FC Wichita Eddie Gomez 2-2 51' GOAL Tulsa Roughnecks Riggs Lennon 3-2 61' GOAL FC Wichita Nelson Landaverde 3-3 87' Red Card Tulsa Roughnecks Ivan Mirkovic 3-3 90' GOAL FC Wichita Franck Tayou 3-4 - FULL TIME - - 3-4

Round 3: FC Wichita plays @ NTX Rayados

Jacksonville Armada FC (NPSL) 1-0 Tampa Bay Rowdies (USL)

8:30 ET - Southern Oak Stadium; Jacksonville, FL

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score - Half Time - - 0-0 58' GOAL Jacksonville Armada James Banks 1-0 - FULL TIME - - 1-0

Round 3: Jacksonville Armada FC hosts Miami United FC

Miami FC 2 (NPSL) 1-3 Miami United FC (NPSL)

7:00 ET – FIU Soccer Stadium; Miami, FL

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 18' GOAL Miami FC Dylan Mares 1-0 45' Red Card Miami FC Kris Tyrpak 1-0 - Half Time - - 1-0 49' GOAL Miami United David Ochoa 1-1 52' GOAL Miami United David Ochoa 1-2 90+3' GOAL Miami United Victor Pelae 1-3 - FULL TIME - - 1-3 - - - - -

Round 3: Miami United FC plays @ Jacksonville Armada FC

[MOS] Midland-Odessa Sockers (NPSL) 0-4 San Antonio FC (USL)

7:30 CT – Grande Communications Stadium; Midland, TX

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 36' GOAL San Antonio Darnell King [MOS] 0-1 - Half Time - - [MOS] 0-1 87' GOAL San Antonio Mikey Lopez [MOS] 0-2 90' GOAL San Antonio Maxi Rodriguez [MOS] 0-3 90+3' GOAL San Antonio Owayne Gordon [MOS] 0-4 - FULL TIME - - [MOS] 0-4

Round 3: San Antonio FC hosts Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC

Nashville SC (USL) 2-0 Inter Nashville FC (NPSL) [INFC]

7:30 CT – Vanderbilt Soccer/Lacrosse Complex; Nashville, TN

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 19' GOAL Nashville FC Tucker Hume 1-0 [INFC] - Half Time - - 1-0 [INFC] 89' GOAL Nashville FC Tucker Hume 2-0 [INFC] - FULL TIME - - 2-0 [INFC]

Round 3: Nashville SC hosts Mississippi Brilla

NTX Rayados (LQ) 5-2 Oklahoma City Energy FC (USL)

7:30 CT – Richland Community College; Dallas, TX

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 41' GOAL NTX Rayados Alberto Rodriguez 1-0 - Half Time - - 1-0 51' GOAL OKC Energy Philip Rasmussen 1-1 61' GOAL OKC Energy Miguel Gonzalez 1-2 90+1' GOAL NTX Rayados Christian Okeke 2-2 - Extra Time - - 2-2 105' GOAL NTX Rayados Christian Okeke 3-2 111' GOAL NTX Rayados Lucio Martinez 4-2 120' GOAL NTX Rayados Roberto Rodriguez 5-2 - AFTER EXTRA TIME - - 5-2

Round 3: NTX Rayados host FC Wichita

Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC (USL) 3-2 FC Denver (LQ) [DEN]

7:00 MT – Weidner Field; Colorado Springs, CO

No stream tonight, sorry

Time Event Team Player Score 36' GOAL [DEN] FC Denver Fernando Magallanes 0-1 [DEN] - Half Time - - 0-1 [DEN] 55' GOAL Colorado Springs Pascal Eboussi 1-1 [DEN] 58' GOAL Colorado Springs Uriel Macias 2-1 [DEN] 76' GOAL [DEN] FC Denver Cesar Castillo 2-2 [DEN] 86' GOAL Colorado Springs Jordan Burt 3-2 [DEN] - FULL TIME - - 3-2 [DEN]

Round 3: Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC plays @ San Antonio FC

Fresno FC (USL) 2-0 Orange County FC (NPSL) [OCFC]

7:00 PT – Lamonica Stadium; Clovis, CA

No stream tonight, sorry

Time Event Team Player Score - Half Time - - 0-0 [OCFC] - Extra Time - - 0-0 [OCFC] 95' GOAL Fresno FC Terran Campbell 1-0 [OCFC] 118' GOAL Fresno FC Terran Campbell 2-0 [OCFC] - AFTER EXTRA TIME - - 2-0 [OCFC]

Round 3: Fresno FC plays @ Sporting Arizona FC

Orange County SC (USL) 2-4 Golden State Force (PDL)

7:00 PT – Orange County Great Park; Irvine, CA

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 29' GOAL Orange County SC Christian Duke 1-0 30' OWN GOAL Orange County SC Gustavo Villalobos 1-1 33' GOAL Orange County SC Thomas Enevoldsen 2-1 - Half Time - - 2-1 47' GOAL Golden State Force Faramilio Allisson 2-2 60' GOAL Golden State Force Samuel Goni 2-3 89' GOAL Golden State Force Pedro Fonseca 2-4 - FULL TIME - - 2-4

Round 3: FC Golden State Force hosts Las Vegas Lights FC

[LVL] Las Vegas Lights FC (USL) 4-2 FC Tucson (PDL)

8:00 PT – Peter Johann Soccer Field; Las Vegas, NV

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score 5' GOAL [LVL] Las Vegas Lights FC Carlos Alvarez [LVL] 1-0 8' GOAL [LVL] Las Vegas Lights FC Marcelo Alatorre [LVL] 2-0 39' GOAL FC Tucson Jason Romero [LVL] 2-1 - Half Time - - [LVL] 2-1 48' GOAL FC Tucson AJ Valenzuela [LVL] 2-2 56' GOAL [LVL] Las Vegas Lights FC Sammy Ochoa [LVL] 3-2 65' GOAL [LVL] Las Vegas Lights FC Sammy Ochoa [LVL] 4-2 - FULL TIME - - [LVL] 4-2

Round 3: Las Vegas Lights FC plays @ FC Golden State Force

Reno 1868 FC (USL) 7-3 Portland Timbers U23 (PDL)

7:30 PT – Greater Nevada Field; Reno, NV

Stream

Time Event Team Player Score 29' GOAL Portland Timbers U23 Ryo Shimazaki 0-1 40' GOAL Portland Timbers U23 Wouter Verstraaten 0-2 45+1' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Jerry van Ewijk 1-2 - Half Time - - 1-2 47' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Jerry van Ewijk 2-2 58' OWN GOAL Reno 1868 FC Dembakwi Yomba 2-3 68' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Danny Musovski 3-3 72' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Danny Musovski 4-3 81' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Jerry van Ewijk 5-3 85' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Lindo Mfeka 6-3 90+3' GOAL Reno 1868 FC Christian Thierjung 7-3 - FULL TIME - - 7-3

Round 3: Reno 1868 FC hosts Sacramento Republic FC

[SAZ] Sporting Arizona FC (LQ) 2-1 Phoenix Rising (USL)

7:00 MT – Chandler-Gilbert Community College; Chandler, AZ

Stream

Full screen

Time Event Team Player Score - Half Time - - [SAZ] 0-0 64' GOAL Phoenix Rising Chris Cortez [SAZ] 0-1 67' GOAL [SAZ] Sporting AZ Danny Arrubla [SAZ] 1-1 - Extra Time - - [SAZ] 1-1 - **AFTER PENALTIES - - [SAZ] 2-1

Round 3: Sporting Arizona FC hosts Fresno FC

Previous Threads: Play-In Round / Round 1, Day 1 / Round 1, Day 2

Visit /r/usopencup for more U.S. Open Cup news and discussion.

submitted by /u/USOC_Matchday to r/MLS
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[FM7] RLMS VI | Round 8 | 2 Hours of Watkins Glen | May 26th - 8:00PM EDT (GMT-4)

San Antonio Sport News - Wed, 05/16/2018 - 09:05
In a rare event, RLMS has NOT had driver visas revoked after a race! The field mostly survived the wet banking at Homestead, and heads to upstate New York for a 2 hour sprint on the short course.

Full lobby? Check. Close qualifying in all 3 classes? Check. Mostly clean racing with variable weather that was enjoyable? Check, check, check. Good return race to GT cars from 2 RORA vets? Check! Good job guys, let's keep the momentum rolling! Congrats to F4H Scottsin and SFM Zai on their class wins, and to AreYouCereal32 for his season-best finish (P2)!

Mandatory listening while reading. - Plug in Baby - Muse, Live at Rome Olympic Stadium

Old Sign-Up Post

Sign-Up Form

If something is different in a race thread than the main post, the race thread is correct.

We will be using RORA's Discord server for voice chat due to the unreliability of XBOX party chat. Failure to use Discord will prevent you from racing. Microphones required for all new racers, strongly preferred for returning. Green Flag: 8:00 PM EDT (GMT-4)
  • Ensure you have all required hardware and software updates completed and functioning prior to joining the event.
  • Qualifying will begin at 8PM sharp
  • If you are late for any reason short of an earthquake, sucks but we will start on time.
  • After qualifying, do not leave the lobby for any reason without asking the race director first.
  • Ensure you have simulation damage set in your PERSONAL assist settings prior to the race start.
  • Ideally the race shall start no later than 8:20PM.
Track Map

Please make an effort to memorize the named corners/regions of the track. It helps with determining incident locations.

  • Track limits will be Forza clean AND 2 wheels on

Race Length:

  • 10 minute qualifying + finish your lap
  • 2 hour race + finish final lap

Track Information: 2.454 mi Short Course, Watkins Glen, New York, USA.

Track Website

[Event Poster]()

Weather: dry

CALENDAR

This should be the final calendar. Thank you to Corey, Kiwi, and Cow for working together with me to avoid conflicts wherever possible.

Round Date Weather Track 1 2/10 Daylight Spa-Francorchamps 2 2/24 Dry -> Rain Suzuka 3 3/24 Night Yas Marina 4 4/7 Daylight Road America 5 4/14 Night Daytona Road Course 6 4/21 Daylight Mugello 7 5/5 rain -> RAIN Homestead Road Course Alt 8 5/26 Daylight Watkins Glen Short 9 6/2 Night Le Mans Bugatti PROCEDURE

Changed due to many complaints.

  • Starts - rows of 2 equally spaced, accelerate when your row hits the line, 100 ft gap between classes
  • Restarts - same as start except single file
  • Race length - number of laps equal to (2 hours)/(P1 class pole time)+3; race until 2 hours have elapsed + finish the lap, or all laps have been completed, whichever happens first
  • Race winner in P1 permitted to continue lapping so credits can be collected
  • When there is not enough time left to complete another lap within the 2 hour limit, the P1 leader calls white flag
  • All cars on the lead lap in each class shall continue racing for position until the leader has announced they have finished AND the relevant cars cross the finish line on the final racing lap
  • Lapped cars are to cease racing the next time they cross the finish line once white flag is called
  • The P1 leader should be the first car to finish the race. Refer to this video for an explanation.
CARS

nothing in table -> nothing changed from stock

P1 - Le Mans Prototype 1 Car PI Upgrades Handicaps 2012 Audi R18 ultra 997 no restrictor 2015 Nissan GT-R LM Nismo 997 remove restrictors, 365F, 265R 2011 Peugeot 908 998
  • BoP revisions being evaluated for this track only!
PC - Prototype Challenge
  • Chevrolet Oreca FLM09 - stock
GT - Grand Touring "2" Car PI Upgrades Handicaps 2009 BMW M3 GT2 831 homologation plate, race brakes 2011 Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 835 race brakes, 335R 2011 Ferrari 458 GTC 835 race brakes, race driveline, 335F, 345R 2011 Porsche 911 GT3 RSR 833 no restrictor, race brakes, 315F, 335R 2013 SRT Viper GTS-R 834 race brakes, 325R BoP
  • The organizer reserves the right to change the builds / handicaps on each car before each race.
  • To be mandatory, BoP changes must be posted at least 24 hours before the race. Otherwise they are strongly encouraged.
  • Personal handicaps will not be used.
LIVERIES
  • Class number plates and identifier panels shared by "WELL DONE BAKU" are mandatory.
  • Absolutely no tobacco or pornographic sponsorship.
  • Alcohol sponsorhip discouraged unless driver is 21+.
  • Do not include twitter handles for teams you are not on.
  • Please refrain from offensive liveries. Determination to be determined by race director.
POINTS
  • Points sheet here
  • Each class will be scored independently.
  • Your lowest event score will be dropped. Disqualifications will not be allowed to drop.
  • Qualifying - 2 points for overall pole - broken in sheet, will fix prior to R09
  • IMSA points scale
  • There is no drop for team points.
  • Points penalties will be applied even if the infraction occurred during a drop round.
CAUTIONS
  • A collision where 2 or more cars exit the racing surface in the adverse direction
  • A vehicle flips over
  • A car runs out of gas on track and cannot exit the racing surface (this may lead to a DSQ if found to be intentional)
  • A medical emergency happens (having to pee is not an emergency)
  • Field frozen when caution is called
  • Overall leader and GT leader reduce speed to safety car (if no SC leader slows to 60 immediately)
  • P1 and PC catch up to the overall leader and GT catches up to the GT leader in a timely manner without passing or crashing
  • Maximum caution length is 5 minutes
  • Field will pass the pit lane no more than 1 time under yellow while waiting for people who pitted to catch up
  • Pits always open
  • If you wish a take a lap back against your class leader, you may not pit under yellow
  • All drivers involved in crashes (and flips) are to start at the back of their class for each restart. If drivers have not caught up to the field, start at the back of those that have.
STARTS
  • Class leader chooses side for odd-positioned cars
  • Rows of 2, 60 ft between rows
  • All cars at 60MPH for start
  • 500 ft between classes
  • Go when your row hits the line
INCIDENT REPORTS
  • If you wish to report an incident, send the /r/redditracing moderators a message with a link to the incident clip and a short explanation of what you think happened.
  • We reserve the right to seek out any clips not reported and take the appropriate action.
  • If your incident involved a moderator, please send another mod a private message if you don't feel comfortable having the affected mod seeing the report.
PIT STOPS
  • There will be 4 required pit stops for P1.
  • There will be 1 required pit stop for PC.
  • There will be 3 requited pit stops for GT.
  • You must start your final pit before the start of the last lap.
  • The blendline must be used on pit entry and exit due to the speed of the track.
SIGNUP FORM ENTRY LIST If your name is not listed / not correct on this list, please let me know! P1 | 14 cars, 1 team Driver Number Class Car Team Livery Chrispiercim 52 P1 Audi R18 Ultra Dr BecKx 22 P1 Audi R18 ultra ObaizdNarwal123 20 P1 Audi R18 ultra #20 Audi Sport SIXTY6 AJAX 66 P1 Audi R18 ultra YMTV VVV DJT R 4 P1 Audi R18 ultra Corey CC97 97 P1 Nissan GT-R LM Nismo Team Nii-san #97 CALSONIC HCR Yuuko 23 P1 Nissan GT-R LM Nismo HCR Nizzybantz SFM CHAIR 27 P1 Nissan GT-R LM Nismo Team Nii-san #27 ZEXEL TcGc KILLER 117 P1 NIssan GT-R LM Nismo SKYACTIV Scrubs P1 TM Touring 118 P1 Nissan GT-R LM Nismo SKYACTIV Scrubs P1 Axel4904 21 P1 Peugeot 908 FD Wanderer 118b P1 Peugeot 908 F4H Scottsin 9 P1 Peugeot 908 #9 PlayStation HCR generaltso 12 P1 Peugeot 908 Kaido HCR PC | 15 cars, 3 teams Driver Number Class Car Team Livery Jack Coffey 7 PC Oreca FLM09 Ax4x Jack-Attack #7 Allied Forces TLR Law 2 PC Oreca FLM09 Ax4x Jack-Attack aceCaptain Slow 86 PC Oreca FLM09 Infinite Garage EXOR Popolac 225 PC Oreca FLM09 Infinite Garage #225 Infinite Garage Darkzer24 24 PC Oreca FLM09 SFM Stinger #24 Reddit Racing JA 37 Viggen 15 PC Oreca FLM09 SFM Stinger AreYouCereal32 32 PC Oreca FLM09 Garuda 10 PC Oreca FLM09 #10 Nikon HCR Daytona 991 PC Oreca FLM09 Kaido HCR SGR HCR Papyrus 42 PC Oreca FLM09 Rudi srt4 41 PC Oreca FLM09 ruthlessrellik 329 PC Oreca FLM09 SFM SKYACTIV 87 PC Oreca FLM09 SirWaters 45 PC Oreca FLM09 GT | 31 cars, 7 teams Driver Number Class Car Team Livery Avcracy 19 GT BMW M3 GT2 AvSo Motorsport IridescentBacon 18 GT BMW M3 GT2 AvSo Motorsport Alphalead15 56 GT BMW M3 GT2 BMW Team RLL WELL DONE BAKU 55 GT BMW M3 GT2 BMW Team RLL #55 BMW Team RLL Haters6onnaHate 69 GT BMW M3 GT2 Dag Motorsports Xornand 3 GT BMW M3 GT2 Dag Motorsports HemroidGelly 0 GT BMW M3 GT2 Melody22B 44 GT BMW M3 GT2 Capirossi22 8 GT Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 Corvette Racing SFM Cowmaster 63 GT Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 Corvette Racing BIGBEN0913 13 GT Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 Blehh HD 14 GT Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 dat iKingFeces 83 GT Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 XxT3rM1n80RxX 16 GT Chevrolet Corvette ZR1 LazyDandy 954 GT Ferrari 458 GTC M0STW4NT3D 08 46 GT Ferrari 458 GTC Eclipse Racing #46 Eclipse Racing Meshugg1t 167 GT Ferrari 458 GTC Puma Racing #167 Puma Snauffleophagus 51 GT Ferrari 458 GTC TUS Grizzly 91 GT Porsche 911 RSR TUS Nobfaje TUS Havoc 92b GT Porsche 911 RSR TUS Nobfaje moneyinbank11 777a GT Porsche 911 RSR TUS Corsa 92 GT Porsche 911 RSR TUS Phloofy 84 GT Porsche 911 RSR TUS VinDoctor21 11 GT Porsche 911 RSR mackleroy45 5 GT SRT Viper GTS-R Pirely Racing #11 GoPro Sarstan237 237 GT SRT Viper GTS-R Pirely Racing SFM Zai 156 GT SRT Viper GTS-R Team Foreca TR SnowStorm 90 GT SRT Viper GTS-R Team Foreca Driver iQ 31 GT SRT Viper GTS-R #31 auto motor sport kiwichris1709 17 GT SRT Viper GTS-R Endurance Chat silverstreak809 93 GT SRT Viper GTS-R Safety Car | 1 car Driver Number Class Car Team Livery whitnith SC SC Audi RS6 RORA Enforcement If your name is not listed / not correct on this list, please let me know! submitted by /u/Sindroome24 to r/redditracing
[link] [comments]

FS a bit of everything (NHL, IHL, ECHL, UHL, CHL, WHL, QMJHL, Russian)

San Antonio Sport News - Mon, 05/14/2018 - 18:51

link w/ pics, info, and prices. Prices include shipping in lower 48. Open to trades and offers, just send me a PM

https://imgur.com/a/klU0fN9

Description Brand Size Note Price San Antonio Dragons Pro Trend XXL Game worn w/LOA $250 Colorado Avs CCM M Jose Theodore $30 Fort Wayne Komets Bauer 54 Game worn $250 Cincinnati Cyclones Bauer XL a few pulls and pills $40 Hampton Roads Admirals High 5 XL back customized as “Mitts” #98 $50 Trenton Titans SP XL signed by 15 players $50 Port Huron Bordercats AK ?? size and brand tags removed from the neck, authentic jersey $75 San Antonio Iguanas AIS XL n/a $50 Kelowna Rockets Reebok 56 Game issued LOA from team $150 Austin Ice Bats AK XL 10th anniv logo $75 Louisville Riverfrogs OT Sports XXL n/a SOLD Pluto Ice Dogs Disney Store XXL n/a $30 Mobile Mysticks K1 XL practice jersey, tear on right side, custom fight strap $25 Mobile Mysticks Bauer XL n/a SOLD Moscow Dynamo Myr 54 Game worn $110 Texas Wildcatters Reebok XL 3rd jersey $65 New Orleans Brass Jersey Express XL n/a $35 Drummondville Voltigeurs Nike 54 Game worn $125 submitted by /u/RoscoeTRobot to r/hockeyjerseys
[link] [comments]

New ESPN/Jonathan Givony Mock Draft - NON-LOTTERY PICKS

San Antonio Sport News - Mon, 05/14/2018 - 12:29

My take: I like it. Hutchison is my guy for now, unless we move up significantly in the draft somehow. Another interesting thing I've noticed in almost all mocks I've been looking at is that Melvin Frazier seems to be dropping back to the high 30's/low-40's of the second round. Knowing Paul Allen's love for buying picks in the second round, I would totally love to take Hutchison with our 1st and buy into the 2nd to snag Frazier for two bites at the 3 spot apple.

PS. Sorry for the format, I tried to clean it up as best as I could without it taking my whole morning.

-15. Washington Wizards

Kevin Knox

Kentucky

Age: 18.7

SF/PF

Height: 6-foot-9 | Weight: 205

With Markieff Morris approaching the final year of his contract, the Wizards could very well start thinking of supplementing their power forward position with a player who fits the modern game.

Knox didn't have an efficient freshman season, partially due to playing out of position, but there's a significant market in the NBA for combo forwards in his mold who can make an open shot, defend multiple positions and offer some offensive versatility. He's one of the youngest players in this draft, so he still has plenty of room to grow.

Starting salary: $2,725,680

-16. Phoenix Suns (via Heat)

Zhaire Smith

Texas Tech

Age: 18.9

SF

Height: 6-foot-5 | Weight: 195

Phoenix could look to continue to add length, athleticism and energy on the defensive end of the floor with the long-armed and explosive Smith.

Originally expected to be more of a 2019 draft candidate, Smith accelerated that timeline by helping Texas Tech reach the Elite Eight. Smith needs to continue to develop his ballhandling and perimeter shooting, but he's one of the best athletes in this draft, and his trajectory as a prospect suggests he has considerable upside left.

Starting salary: $2,589,480

-17. Milwaukee Bucks

Aaron Holiday

UCLA

Age: 21.6

PG

Height: 6-foot-1 | Weight: 187

With Eric Bledsoe approaching the final year of his contract, the Bucks could very well look at finding a point guard who complements their existing pieces and whom they can hopefully build around for the long term.

Holiday had an outstanding junior season, and he would bring a number of attractive traits with his microwave scoring ability, long wingspan and toughness. The fact that he can space the floor and play off the ball is important considering the building blocks the Bucks already have in place.

Starting salary: $2,460,000

-18. San Antonio Spurs

Keita Bates-Diop

Ohio State

Age: 22.2

PF

Height: 6-foot-7 | Weight: 235

With the uncertainty around Kawhi Leonard -- along with Rudy Gay, Kyle Anderson and Danny Green all potentially entering free agency -- the Spurs could use some depth at the forward spots.

With that in mind, drafting a versatile player like Bates-Diop makes sense. He increased his stock dramatically with a breakout season, moving among all of the frontcourt positions for an overachieving Ohio State team. He looks like an ideal fit for the modern NBA if he can find a way to rev his motor into higher gear at the professional level.

Starting salary: $2,337,000

-19. Atlanta Hawks (via Wolves)

Troy Brown

Oregon

Age: 18.7

SG

Height: 6-foot-7 | Weight: 210

With the second of their three first-round picks, the Hawks might look to add some depth on the wing.

Brown's size, multipositional defense and upside could be intriguing at this stage of the draft. He's one of the youngest players in this class and has the type of character and intangibles that bode well for his chances of achieving his full potential. Becoming a better shooter will be a major key for him.

Starting salary: $2,231,760

-20. Minnesota Timberwolves (via Thunder)

Dzanan Musa

Cedevita

Age: 19.0

SF

Height: 6-foot-9 | Weight: 195

The Wolves have very little depth at the forward spots and may not have the financial flexibility to keep Nemanja Bjelica if his restricted free agency offers get out of hand.

Musa's size, scoring instincts and aggressiveness could be intriguing at this stage of the draft. He's one of the youngest players in this class but already productive in Europe, playing at a fairly high level.

Starting salary: $2,142,360

-21. Utah Jazz

Anfernee Simons

IMG Academy (HS)

Age: 18.9

SG

Height: 6-foot-4 | Weight: 183

The Jazz might look for a versatile guard who can operate in different lineups without dominating the ball alongside Donovan Mitchell. Simons is one of the least NBA-ready players in the draft, but he's intriguing because of his combination of youth, explosiveness and shot-making prowess.

He's a few years away from panning out, but at this stage of the draft, there isn't much risk, and adding a prospect with his upside would be intriguing.

Starting salary: $2,056,680

-22. Chicago Bulls (via Pelicans)

Jacob Evans

Cincinnati

Age: 20.8

SG/SF

Height: 6-foot-6 | Weight: 210

Shooting and depth at the wing spots will likely be priorities for the Bulls this offseason (not unlike most teams in the NBA).

Evans is an ultra-versatile player who guards all over the floor, played on and off the ball for Cincinnati and sports a career 38 percent mark from 3-point territory at the college level.

Starting salary: $1,974,480

-23. Indiana Pacers

Khyri Thomas

Creighton

Age: 22.0

SG

Height: 6-foot-3 | Weight: 210

Unless a major upgrade at point guard presents itself, shooting and depth at the wing/combo forward spots will likely be priorities for the Pacers this offseason.

Thomas is one of the better defenders in college basketball, capable of guarding three positions with his 6-foot-11 wingspan. He's also a willing ball-mover and a promising spot-up shooter and has exactly the type of grit and unselfishness the NBA covets in role players.

Starting salary: $1,895,520

-24. Portland Trail Blazers

Chandler Hutchison

Boise State

Age: 22.0

SG/SF

Height: 6-foot-7 | Weight: 193

Portland's wing rotation could use some added depth.

Hutchison made significant strides with his game as a senior. He looks primed to take advantage of the lack of wings in the draft -- and the NBA in general -- this June. He has outstanding physical tools and is a much-improved ball handler and perimeter shooter.

Starting salary: $1,819,800

-25. Los Angeles Lakers (via Cavs)

Mitchell Robinson

College: None

Age: 20.1

C

Height: 6-foot-11 | Weight: 20.1

The Lakers don't have anything in the way of a rim-protector on their roster, with all of their centers being of the skilled-but-lumbering variety. The contract of their starting center, Brook Lopez, is also expiring this summer.

Robinson is one of the most talented prospects in the draft physically -- with impressive length, athleticism and shot-blocking instincts -- but is far away from contributing. The fact that he elected not to play college basketball this season won't help his NBA readiness, but at some point in the draft, he's worth taking a gamble on as a developmental project.

Starting salary: $1,746,840

-26. Philadelphia 76ers

Bruce Brown

Miami

Age: 21.7

SG

Height: 6-foot-3 | Weight: 200

The Sixers are loaded at most positions and might not be looking to add as many rookies to their roster as they have draft picks. If they do keep this pick, they'll want to add someone who brings toughness, versatility, defense and doesn't need to dominate the ball to be effective, all characteristics Brown seems to posses.

Although he had a disappointing season that ended with an injury, Brown is a willing passer, lockdown defender and gritty rebounder, and he has shown enough promise with his jump shot at times to lead you to believe he will become adequate there eventually. There's a significant market for players in his mold, provided he has a strong pre-draft process.

Starting salary: $1,689,000

-27. Boston Celtics

De'Anthony Melton

USC

Age: 19.9

PG/SG

Height: 6-foot-3 | Weight: 195

The Celtics have a tough decision in front of them with Marcus Smart entering restricted free agency and Terry Rozier extension eligible, and they might need to find a less expensive backcourt option to avoid luxury tax issues.

Melton looked to be on the verge of a breakout season for USC before the FBI's investigation into recruiting shut him down indefinitely. His defensive versatility, toughness and intangibles make him a prospect worth investing in.

Starting salary: $1,640,400

-28. Golden State Warriors

Jalen Brunson

Villanova

Age: 21.6

PG

Height: 6-foot-2 | Weight: 200

The Warriors are way over the luxury tax and will want to find contributors on cheap rookie contracts.

Villanova's NCAA tournament run and the ultra-efficient play of their floor general may cause the Warriors to take a look at the versatility and shot-making prowess of the Wooden Award winner. His leadership, toughness and intangibles could be attractive on a roster that already has quite a bit of talent. The fact that he's shown the ability to operate off the ball certainly helps.

Starting salary: $1,630,320

-29. Brooklyn Nets (via Raptors)

Moritz Wagner

Michigan

Age: 21.0

C

Height: 6-foot-11 | Weight: 231

The Nets don't have much in the way of shooting in the frontcourt and aren't really committed to any 4s or 5s long-term besides promising rookie Jarrett Allen and the deadweight contract of Timofey Mozgov.

Wagner brings floor spacing and a high-energy style of play. He was one of the breakout players of month of March, leading Michigan to a Big Ten title and a surprise run to the NCAA championship game.

Starting salary: $1,618,320

-30. Atlanta Hawks (via Rockets)

Grayson Allen

Duke

Age: 22.5

SG

Height: 6-foot-4 | Weight: 185

With their third and final first-round pick, the Hawks might look to add some backcourt depth, specifically someone who can play behind or alongside incumbent starters Dennis Schroder and Kent Bazemore.

Allen is a big-time shot-maker who should be ready to contribute fairly soon as one of the lone NCAA seniors projected to be picked in the first round.

Starting salary: $1,606,680

Second round

-31. Suns

Elie Okobo | PG | Age: 20.5 | Pau-Orthez

-32. Grizzlies

Tyus Battle | SG/SF | Age: 20.6 | Syracuse

-33. Hawks

Jontay Porter | C | Age: 18.4 | Missouri

-34. Mavericks

Donte DiVincenzo | PG | Age: 21.2 | Villanova

-35. Magic

Shake Milton | PG/SG | Age: 21.6 | SMU

-36. Kings

Melvin Frazier | SF | Age: 21.6 | Tulane

-37. Knicks (from Bulls)

Gary Trent Jr. | SG | Age: 19.3 | Duke

-38. 76ers (from Nets)

Jerome Robinson | PG | Age: 21.2 | Boston College

-39. 76ers (from Knicks)

Chimezie Metu | PF/C | Age: 21.1 | USC

-40. Nets (from Lakers)

Hamidou Diallo | SG | Age: 19.7 | Kentucky

-41. Magic (from Hornets)

Jevon Carter | PG | Age: 22.6 | West Virginia

-42. Pistons

Landry Shamet | PG | Age: 21.0 | Wichita St.

-43. Nuggets (from Clippers)

Devonte' Graham | PG | Age: 23.2 | Kansas

-44. Wizards

Malik Newman | PG/SG | Age: 21.2 | Kansas

-45. Nets (from Bucks)

Rodions Kurucs | SF/PF | Age: 20.2 | Barcelona 2

-46. Rockets (from Heat)

Justin Jackson | SF/PF | Age: 21.2 | Maryland

-47. Lakers (from Nuggets)

Isaac Bonga | SF | Age: 18.5 | Frankfurt

-48. Wolves

Devon Hall | SG | Age: 22.8 | Virginia

-49. Spurs

Tony Carr | PG | Age: 20.5 | Penn St

-50. Pacers

Trevon Duval | PG | Age: 19.7 | Duke

-51. Pelicans

Sviatoslav Mykhailiuk | SG | Age: 20.9 | Kansas

-52. Jazz

Kevin Hervey | SF | Age: 21.8 | Texas Arlington

-53. Thunder

Rawle Alkins | SG | Age: 20.5 | Arizona

-54. Mavericks (from Blazers)

Brandon McCoy | C | Age: 19.9 | UNLV

-55. Hornets (from Cavaliers)

Jalen Hudson | SG | Age: 21.9 | Florida

-56. 76ers

Kostas Antetokounmpo | SF | Age: 20.4 | Dayton

-57. Thunder (from Celtics)

Issuf Sanon | PG/SG | Age: 18.5 | Olimpija Ljubljana

-58. Nuggets (from Warriors)

Kenrich Williams | PF | Age: 23.4 | TCU

-59. Suns (from Raptors)

Karim Jallow | SF | Age: 21.0 | Bayern Muenchen

-60. 76ers (from Rockets)

Amine Noua | PF | Age: 21.1 | Villeurbanne

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The 36 team league.

San Antonio Sport News - Sun, 05/13/2018 - 15:58

I know these posts usually get insta-downvoted without anyone even reading them but give me a shot here and read it through.

I think from a logistical standpoint it can work. There are definitely enough markets that would financially be able to support an NFL team. That's never really been a question imo, relocations only happen now because of stadium disputes.
Would it dilute the league? Yes but that argument has been made for years now and yet leagues keep expanding.

The expansion cities: London, Mexico City, Portland, and San Diego/San Antonio.
With the CTE thing I feel the best thing for the owners to do now is to try to get the sport more internationally recognized to get people playing it overseas. This and the money in the TV deals are the biggest reasons why the NFL will try to go to London. Mexico City gets a team because they've shown more interest and are even closer to US soil. Plus they're in the same timezone too so there's no reason to not have a team go there.

I like the realignment for a 36 team league.
First the return to NFC/AFC East/Central/West.
AFC East:
New England Patriots
New York Jets
Miami Dolphins
Indianapolis Colts
London Monarchs
Buffalo Bills

AFC Central:
Baltimore Ravens
Pittsburgh Steelers
Jacksonville Jaguars
Tennessee Titans
Cincinnati Bengals
Cleveland Browns

AFC West:
Mexico City Dragons
LA Chargers
LV Raiders
Denver Broncos
Houston Texans
Kansas City Chiefs

NFC East:
Philadelphia Eagles
Dallas Cowboys
Washington Redskins
NY Giants
Atlanta Falcons
New Orleans Saints

NFC Central:
Chicago Bears
Green Bay Packers
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Carolina Panthers
Detroit Lions
Minnesota Vikings

NFC West:
Seattle Seahawks
San Francisco 49ers
LA Rams
Arizona Cardinals
Portland Rain
San Antonio/San Diego Bulls

As you can see old rivalries get brought back together and new rivalries form. Other than the Panthers/Falcons, no rivalry gets broken apart. Under this realignment teams will play 18 weeks which includes 2 bye weeks. The extra bye is added for the extra travel and logistics for a London team. The London team will play under a 4 home, 4 away, 4 home, 4 away schedule where they have 2 bases in the US (one on the East Coast and one on the West Coast) during their road travels. London will finish the season away to make it fair for the playoffs where both teams would have the travel barrier. The teams will play 10 divisional games and 6 games against another division which means that every team in a given division will play the same schedule with no "unfair" advantages.

Any thoughts on this proposal? Also how do you make tables so I can put the divisions in those instead?

submitted by /u/MalopRupt to r/nfl
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The Standings Game - Ideal Results for the Week of May 14th, 2018

San Antonio Sport News - Sun, 05/13/2018 - 10:10

Welcome to The Standings Game!

The Standings Game is something I plan on putting together every week for this subreddit so we can keep track of our race to a playoff berth. It is essentially a list of the most ideal results for all USL games (with respect to Colorado Springs's position in the standings) on a given week. I will only assign ideal outcomes to games that affect the Western Conference standings.

I will also make a note of which games are most important to our current situation in the standings. These will mostly be intra-conference games, however they can also include games where a team is threatening to remove us from a playoff position, or games with a significant statistical impact on Colorado Springs's playoff chances.

At the end of each week's schedule, I will update the list with the actual results, as well as indicate how the game affected our statistical probability of making the playoffs. Games that have an insignificant or near-zero effect on our standings will be denoted with a +/-0.0% value. Games regarding teams that have already clinched a playoff berth or been statistically eliminated will not be listed, unless their opponent is of relevance to Colorado Springs's standings.

Please note that there might be some numbers that don't quite make sense, or percentages that may change in the middle of an evening of games. I'll do my best to update and explain these, but if anything seems off or confusing, feel free to ask!

Note: all ideal results are assumed to be regulation victories, unless otherwise noted.

Ideal Results for Friday, May 18th, 2018

Matchup Ideal Result Importance Actual Result Playoff % Effect Los Angeles Galaxy II @ Portland Timbers 2 LAG Win/Draw Average TBD TBD%

Ideal Results for Saturday, May 19th, 2018

Matchup Ideal Result Importance Actual Result Playoff % Effect Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC @ OKC Energy FC COS Win Key Game TBD TBD% Swope Park Rangers @ Rio Grande Valley FC Draw Average TBD TBD% Tulsa Roughnecks FC @ San Antonio FC TUL Win Average TBD TBD% Sacramento Republic FC @ Phoenix Rising FC PHX Win Average TBD TBD% Seattle Sounders FC 2 @ Reno 1868 FC SEA Win/Draw Average TBD TBD% Real Monarchs SLC @ Las Vegas Lights FC SLC Win Average TBD TBD%

Colorado Springs Switchbacks FC Playoff Chances
Before Games: 40.3%
After Games: TBD%
Change: TBD%

Last Weeks Standings Game
Current USL Standings
Sports Clubs Stats: Source used to extrapolate all data in this post.

submitted by /u/tugreenwave to r/SwitchbacksFC
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